making our marriage better

my wife and i have a very unique marriage.  we are both strong willed, dramatic, loving,   but love a good fight - never physical thank G-d.  We are both very responsible parents, and we've had to really work at our marriage.  We DO have fun, but not all the time.  Minette is a little resistant to learning marriage skills, and I'm not much better.  She is very supportive of my efforts as a family lawyer to save marriages, but warns me not all should be saved, even for the kids. 

We could have thrown in the towel many times, but always hung in there, and its gotten better every year.  I think that every  one knows at some level if they've married the right person no matter how rough it gets some time.  how do you know?  if only one of you can make the adjustment needed at that time, and things get better.  and look at what you bring each other...the positives...also...do you get upset about the same things?  if you don't and fight about that, see it another way - it may be good that you  are upset about different things - thats what has saved our marriage - seeing the other person for who they are and not resisting, learning to love.